We have all been through trying times. It is in fact, one of those things which binds humans together; the relative commonness of the experiences which we have. Yet, some people handle tragedy with finesse while for others, it simply buries them. How and why does this happen? What differentiates these groups of people from one another?
Can we say life is unfair with regards to the punches which it throws at us all? I suppose so. Yet, we cannot afford to wallow in the dust, taking in shallow breaths as we dwell in misery. No! Life doesn’t respect those who throw weakness at it, you have to show strength if you want to be taken seriously, and if you do not want people to take advantage of you.
To be truly free, you have to detach yourself from the aftermath of painful and sad occurrences. You have to put up a no-looking-back policy in your mind, filtering every event and occurrence through this filter. The world has several examples of people who have failed woefully, been mocked and told that they cannot amount to anything. You know what? These people took these occurrences and through them, came to such a place of excellence that the world could only look on in awe. Take Oprah as an example. Over three decades ago when the black woman dare not raise her head in mainstream media, Oprah did what no one else before her had the nerve to consider- and she blew all of our minds! Today, she experiences a level of freedom which many can’t dream about; all because she chose to look everyone and everything which limited her in the face, telling them as clearly as she could that she’d chase her dreams.
Sometimes, in the aftermath of events, we consider what we could have done better and how we’d have handled situations more correctly and discover smarter ways in those retrospective moments. Instead of wallowing in misery because of our failure, isn’t it more productive to apply those new lessons to situations that come afterwards?
The real mistake in life isn’t the experience of failure (because different people have unique definitions of terms such as failure, mediocrity, and excellence). The real mistake/ tragedy is getting one’s identity from the harrowing experiences of life, and comparing one’s self with another/ others.
When failure crosses your path, how do you handle it? When you remember the wrong that has been done to you, do you keep blaming others or have you learnt to let go? True freedom is living life on your terms, instead of on the terms of others- and if you continue to let what has happened in your past to dictate what will happen in your future, you will never know what freedom feels like; it will look like a mirage to you. I say this because even in the midst of plenteousness, you might never be truly free if you don’t learn to handle situations correctly; with the kind of finesse which is not afforded by a life which shaped solely by negative past experiences.
